Tree-top Party – A Poem

By Leila Bawa – Dreaming at the November 2016 Experience Weekend

Tree-top Party


Let me move slowly
And with love
Moving in love,
Close to the earth,
Merging with
The earthen undergrowth.

The wind is blowing,
I feel the reminder,
“I am here”, “I am here”,
Breath breathing being
Just here.
The trees are whispering,
“It’s okay, it’s okay, life is here!”
Their leaves dance in this ecstasy,
Each one inviting me to join their tree-top party,
Just where I am.

And in their ecstasy
These leaves are falling,
With grace each descends,
Lets go, fully and totally,
Without concern
Of where its future lies,
Whether it will rest upon the earth
Or float upon the stream,
Whether it will slowly break down
Or suddenly burn,
Leaf has no concern
About tomorrow.

I see you leaf
And I see you seeing me,
And you are still dancing
On your forest floor,
And you hold upon you
A tiny tuft of moss,
While you balance on your edge,
While you are half brown,
Half shrivelled
And still in celebration!
I see you and I listen.
So simple this being here,
I remember this being here
This being home.

A deep sadness,
Deep wail from the womb,
That I once left,
That I keep leaving,
That I keep thinking I have to do something important.
That this shame, this inadequacy
Drives me to act out of lack, blinded in fear,
Not seeing that I am lying in a field of abundance.
Not seeing that the leaves are seeing me.
Me, this animal, breath breathing being
Who needs to be nothing other than
What and whom she already is.
That the leaves are inviting me personally,
Calling my name
To dance with them in their tree-top party.
And I am hiding in fear, ashamed,
Whether I will be accepted,
Expecting to be rejected,
And making it so.

This moment, now,
Close to the forest floor
Animal in the undergrowth
Each breath like a falling leaf
I let it go.
I let it go and welcome what is here.
I welcome you, ‘fear of rejection’.
I welcome you, ‘ashamed of being here’,
I welcome you, ‘sun on my skin’ and ‘maybe it’s okay’,
I hold you all, each one a precious leaf
In this tree-top party,
I dance with each one of you
And breathe
And let it go.
I am here.